MY STORY
Meaningful change is grounded in respect for and understanding of the strengths, needs and daily lives, of children, families and those who support them.
I can still see two visitors who came to observe at the Bank Street Infant and Family Center – 40 years later. Each was dressed in a crisp blouse, skirt, stockings, and low heels.
It was a busy day. The teething baby on my shoulder was fussy and drooling on my old tee-shirt. Jerry (26 months) needed help to remember not to bite.
I greeted our guests and showed them where to sit.
My co-teacher, Gwen, and I had decided earlier to divide the group. She would take Jerry and two others to buy pears for snack while I “stayed home” with the others. Our thinking: Jerry would get a needed break from the large group and yes, those of us staying behind would get a break from Jerry. We’d all go outside later.
After the shoppers left, I started to read, one toddler on each side of me and the baby with a teething toy on my lap. A few minutes later, our visitors stood up to leave. I smiled “goodbye”. One of them walked over to me.
“Thank you,” she said, standing over me. “We enjoyed our visit. But… I think the water table should be over there. And shouldn’t you take all the children outside to play?”
I can still remember how this woman’s tone (her nice clothes too, I have to admit) left me feeling defensive and annoyed. How different it all would have been if she had paused to see and listen and learn from me. If she had said something like, “I’m curious. Why did only a few children go outside?’ Or “I wonder what might happen if you moved the water table?”
I may have experimented with the water table soon. Turned out she was right. And she may have learned about how to support both children and adults in a group setting.
Still, I’m grateful. Our interaction gave me an insight that has shaped my work ever since: